D3 body, D1 cock
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
She said her first boyfreind was so small she is still technically a virgin.
The vibrator you gave me is probably the one thing I will never give up if we got robbed at gunpoint
mom came into my room and asked to borrow some condoms. We have gotten to the point where it's not awkward anymore.
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
I puked right in front of him after winning beer olympics and he still hooked up with me. My life is so easy.
I woke up with the Dorothy costume at my ankles, both sparkly red shoes on, and clutching ToTo....we're not in Kansas anymore, dude
You kept asking her which dick pills worked the best. She's a grandmother.
Those tiny little fruit fly looking mofos. They fly past the phone and I grabbed them like Daniel-San
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
My purpose is to unleash drunk self on strangers, i believe as some terrifying icebreaker, otherwise i too would offer my driving services.
In case you're wondering what I'm doing, I'll be banging an 18 year old this weekend. Repeatedly.
Stay calm. It's a titty bar. A ring of cocaine will protect you.
She then told me, and I quote "I want to send you nudes just to see how you'd react."
Randomize
