His shopping cart was nothing but malt liquor and zucchini.
Your dignity remains intact. He, on the other hand, is completely convinced he slept with your cat.
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
THEY ARE MY AGE. THEY ARE YOUR LITTLE SISTER'S AGE THIS IS A DELICATE MATTER. CAPS LOCK
I showed that dick picture that your date texted you to everyone because you passed out and left your phone unattended. Your fault. Plus his cock was big so his fault too.
That girl next to you randomly said that she fits into a queen sized pillow case
WTF.
I tried...failed..now im naked on the futon since clothes are hard.
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
It doesn't count as "finding the lesbian" if you fuck a straight girl!
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
Hypothetically speaking, if a girl asks you to fuck her wearing only your hockey helmet, is that socially acceptable?
When the bouncer doesn't let you in... Don't ask him where he works so you could file a complaint with the better business bureau... It only proves him right.
It's 5 PM...and you're 35. Congrats on being an amazing human being.
Wait, you met him on Onlyfans? The guy from last night? Which one of you is the fan?
Because one of you banged your stalker
Randomize
