okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
Friend I haven't seen in almost a year just IMed me to let me know that my mom stuck her boob out the window on the freeway at her.
Her mom responded by mooning my mother. I really don't know what's worse.
I may also break bread with strippers. Because it is passover.
You'll be the guy with the raft that sells burritos on the river. You'd be legendary.
This girl can open a bottle without using her hands and she's 21. She meets my standards
Some chick just tried to plug her vodka into the wall.
I just got a mental picture of us having sex in a trash can.
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
I didn't want to walk to anymore parties because I found a cat. It was magical.
Pretty sure the cop told you that you were the first person he pulled over for being drunk on a tractor. So there's that.
Reminding you of hookups your brain is trying to suppress. That's what friends are fooooooooor...
he was the first penis i touched… i have to go to his shitty bands first gig, i mean come on now
He saw my Halloween/ Costume closet and assumed I’m into cosplay. I’m going with it. What’s sexier, a cop or a nurse?
Randomize
