I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
Did she have bad breath? Bad breath makes you think of all the bad things in the world
It's been a long time since I felt this bad on a Monday... and for that, I thank you.
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
Chasing bourbon with pepto... Dedication.
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
Dude, you passed out sitting straight up AND in mid sentence last night
You told your mom that it was your second day sober. I think she believed it until you jumped off the balcony
you said "i met the love of my life tonight" and i said "me?" and you said "no, hummus"
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
I DO have hobbies! I drink. I drink more. I catfish men on Grindr with photos of guys who are less attractive than me. I listen to Lovecraftian podcasts. I'm very well-rounded.
Just almost drowned myself in the shower again. I need an adult.
Get to the bar now. Ryan is single again and every skank on campus that has heard story about his dick is circling like a shark. A cock hungry shark
Randomize