I plan on putting pajamas back on after I shower. Today is going to be awesome.
it's like everything I expected to see tonight all put together in one at once
that is the greatest description ever
Everytime I walk into a bathroom at school that I've taken a pregnancy test in I get a little bit nostalgic....
She's the only person who can pull off turning an outdoor patio heater tower into a stripper pole.
There are beer cans & oyster shells along the side of the road. I belong here
Now you know for the next time you go in the basement to wear a helmet
Are we still banned from the library?
I don't understand how 5 bottles of booze became normal or acceptable per 2.5 people
My day went from bad to worse when I realized I puked out my second floor window last night.
I also just stashed a half dozen bobby pins in my bra.... So when you take it off later, consider yourself warned
just got a call from a life insurance sellsperson and apparently our xany dealer referenced us. not cool thats breaking the 4th wall
I need to wash the frat house off of me
They walked into the house to see me in my neon pink knee high socks trying to pull you out of the cat carrier by your legs...
I love when Facebook suggests people I may know. Well, yeah, I know him. He's my drug dealer. Pretty sure I want to keep that relationship strictly professional.
They made the paper for stealing gnomes. I fucked a local celebrity.
Randomize
