I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
If I knew losing weight would mean this many fucking creepers I would've just stayed fat.
I miss college girls! You know how depressing it is to fuck 30 year olds? That's what failure feels like
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My life is over. I farted in open court. Noticeably. The judge looked at me. It echoed.
My ultimate goal is to get laid wearing a horse mask... That would be awesome on all possible levels
I couldn't find pants for like 20 minutes so I was butt ass naked just sitting on your floor
he's like a horny 3rd grader on cocaine. he needs a leash
My Midnight Kiss was a Big Mac.. Happy New Year
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
come over. We can flirt with the criteria for substance abuse and talk about our daddy issues
Blowing a married man is so much more important than a 12 year olds basketball game.
He? As in you personified your dick?
Scientific fact: if he makes a face like a demonic dog when he's fucking you, makes it easier to fuck without feelings.
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
The only words I could make out were "Dicksmash McIroncock".
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