bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
another moral hangover. fuck.
his ringtone is the jonas brothers. get me the fuck out of here NOW.
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
I hit her tiny dog with a horseshoe an hour ago. Her and her mom cried as it laid on the ground shaking. Im drunk.
I don't care. I'm going to fuck John's friend and it's all your fault.
I went back up to the apartment to get her phone and when I came back she was peeing on the sidewalk
Not sure if this is better or worse than the discovery that bourbon and hot chocolate is a viable combo
You did that scary laugh you always do when you're blacking out except she's never heard it before and though you were choking and screamed at all of us when we didn't call an ambulance
Coming to you live from the floor of my office..
Life just isn't the same without him waking me up at 4 in the afternoon with a look of pity on his face...
I apologize for being mean. I love the blender and your vagina.
We had a One Night Stand 6 months ago but he just Facebook invited me to his wedding. Who the fuck does that.
FYI telling a guy that you're glad his dick isn't big after giving him a bj, is NOT a compliment.
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