Lady GaGa only went backwards in convincing me she's not a man at the VMAs.
that cunt stole my fb status. SHE'S NOT THAT FUNNY
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
Any questions about why there was a scuba tank chilling in the hot tub this morning?
Just ordered a clown who does balloon animals. No backing out now.
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
In other words, he somehow found his way to my apartment, wasted, and was naked on my new couch. Completely naked. It was too special to pass up.
They invented the twister shot game. You put a shot on each circle, take it when you land on it, and if you fall, they funnel the mat and make you drink it. New best friends.
I'm at home, drinking with my cat. While this is an enjoyable lifestyle, other plans are preferable.
He sent me a mirror pic of himself and sent it to me and all i could think about was the amazing bong hits i took with his roommate in that bathroom.
Well I'm going to hell. But I'm going after multiple orgasms.
My roommate told me he found me naked in the shower puking and when he asked why I was naked I said "you can't wear clothes in a shower"
I think all the guys I've fucked in my life would get along perfectly. They'd probably form an orchestra and travel the fucking world. That gives me the slightest feeling of consistency in life which is great.
You know you're out of shape when you're sore after masturbating.
You don't know happiness until you've got to smoke weed inside taco bell and then eat all you want for free
Randomize
