Can you do me a favor and fuck someone with a car so I can get a ride home?
You had me sold at "fucking you down the slide"
AND OMG I HOPE YOU ARE GREAT WITH CHILD. COOK THAT BUN!
You. Me. A bottle of Vodka. The wilderness.
Dude, you chugged an entire bottle of tomato sauce and got us free drinks for the night. No way was I gonna stop you.
Bro, the freshmen are smoking in the park again, do you need ammo for ur paintball gun?
I'm 11 for 13 getting drunker than the person who's birthday it is
She stopped laughing and kind of stared at the wall for a while. Then she did 3 somersaults and said she saw jesus. This weed is fucking fantastic.
forgot to tell you your neighbor walked out of her house this morning just as I was leaving shirtless
They forgot my ranch. They're dead to me.
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
THAT BEAUTIFUL FACE AND HEAVENLY LIGHTING IS NOT HELPING THE NOT DEAD POINT HOW DO I NOT KNOW YOU ARE NOT TEXTING ME FROM THE AFTERLIFE
The after life smells like latex gloves and hand soap
Is it something I'm going to want to hug you for or slap you for?
this dude is way too smart. he just explained to me the different scientific components of drugs while we smoked. i said i loved icecream.
Have u seen my vagina and my gorilla costume? Im in need of it.
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