WTF. you left me with no condoms and you ate all my mac and cheese. scumbag.
Just soaked up some whiskey with a paper towel and then squeezed it into a cup for consumption. New low.
On the plus side I got to ride in a fire truck and I didn't have to blow anybody for it
He deleted all his profile pics with her. It was like the bat signal for single women everywhere.
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And before you get all mad cause I said "nipples," I actually discarded "you are so wet right now" and "you have such a raging clit-on right now."
That's called being sensitive.
Well, I plan on starting the night dressed as little red riding hood. Then I plan on finishing the night dressed as a shit show in a red cape.
He said I could pay him back in blow jobs. What's the going rate for those these days?
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
By early evening I was shouting at the deeply Christian girl to suck my dick inbetween snorting lines of gatorade powder.
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All I'm saying is the next time I see him naked, there better be something in it for me that doesn't end in bailing him out of jail.
sooo trippy being back in town after 5 years. if you had asked me in high school who would be future coke heads, i would have been way off
I wanna hang out. The cats don't talk back.
I'm just so full of love and alcohol
Maybe if you would fuck your boss you would get string cheese too
i fucked his best friend. once right next door to him. i'm pretty sure that could be called sweet revenge.
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