you called to congratulate me on being the reason you lost never have i ever
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
Best. Handjob. Ever.
I'm guessing Kelly is over?
Nope. Home alone.
I now have an ENTIRE drawer of unused disposable silverware from Boston Market... and you guys said I needed to "buy" kitchen stuff
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
I get off at the next exit which doesn't have a shoulder, a guy is riding my ass so I cant stop. I think I got as much puke on his car as on mine.
You did that scary laugh you always do when you're blacking out except she's never heard it before and though you were choking and screamed at all of us when we didn't call an ambulance
I woke up with his condom in my mouth. I actually use them now you should be proud of me.
I'm pretty sure the guy who was grinding on me while I was trying to get a drink at he bar was one of my tinder matches
Well I didn't know she was a dominatrix...so I kind of just went with it
listen I need taco bell and an orgasm within the next hour. I'll leave the order in which you provide those things up to you
I know how to kill a man with nutmeg and a sword. You in?
Or nah
I just masturbated at work... Don't know why but I thought you should know
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