I'm really into asian looking animals
i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
If we're like this now and women reach their sexual peak in their 30's, I can't even fathom what our futures hold.
Her dress is practically falling off. It must know I'm here.
I'm legit concerned I might pass out this weekend from having too much sex.
No i peed with you in the toilet. The guy I high fived was mid pee in front of the urinal
His idea of romance is drunkenly leaving me dead dandelions on my car in the middle of the night
I did a hand stand against the glass wall at Ziggy's with no panties on and got 3 phone numbers. Thank God I shaved this morning...
Based on your 5AM twitter activity I gather you found MORE FREE COKE??
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
Ive fucked up. im like a feral dog rabidly chasing an infrequent dream amidst a cataclysm of disaster
I'm fucking a man old enough to be my father who is also dating my boss. What have you done with your life?
I held the blackjack dealer's hand and told the old asian woman she was 'soft to the touch, but cold as ice"
i can eat my weight in tater tots. don't test me, bitch
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