How is your vagina???
Double booked
With your butt?
Totes, candlesticks and all
Yay!!
my boobs are a 3G dead zone. as soon as i take my phone out of my bra, it has a signal again.
Update from family reunion: my aunt Janet once got her legs stuck behind her head. The fire department had to be called.
so after morning sex, she rolled a joint and turned on sports center
you might have found the rare bro goddess. i thought they were myth
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
Dude i just want you to know that when i found you half your mustache was already gone. I didn't do it.
Im still in bed and cant move and i only had Two beers and a shot last night... how did I make it in college?
God gave us a 4 year grace period.
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
Dude she flew me 1000 miles down to see her, broke up with me 7 hrs after arrival, and kicked me out with a week left til I fly home. Thank god college taught me how to shack up
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fuck I am starving. I don't think I've eaten in the past two days.
You didnt need to. Gin is like eggs, its a perfectly nutrionally balanced meal.
I just found a list in your handwriting titled "Places I've Peed." The National Mall and 'under the second bridge after the bend in the road' are two of the tamer entries. I tip my hat.
I say we go and bring jello shots with laxatives. 57% sure one of his toilets is broken
I kept resisting the urge to yell "2 for 2!" so they could hear me on the other side of the wall.
It's has to do with my genitals. Don't ask.
He pulled out the guitar, sat in tub, and took requests while she puked her brains out in the toilet. I think he loves her.
Randomize