You know, Peter Parker would not have been nearly as cool if he had gotten bitten by an ant.
I need hand sanitizer and jesus.
im sober playing flip cup. its like cheating.
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have a plus one for the Blackout Express, should I pen in your name?
The homeless guy out front said it's his birthday and he asked us to join him for happy hour after work. He's buying a fifth of gin to celebrate.
Sweetie, don't go home with him. You can do so much better. Everyone else at the bar agrees.
So apparently nutella and chocolate body paint aren't actually the same thing.
im lying in bed trying to choke myself out because being awake hurts too much
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
It's always appealing to be able to say to someone "I banged your mom"
So the girl I met at the bar last night came home with me. Played with my puppy. And left.
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
Do me a favor and scream dirty things at him in a polite sexy, come hither way
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
Randomize