im so drunk with asians
where?
always
A piece of cheeseburger just fell between my tits. Consider this a "wish you were here" postcard.
My cab driver just texted me 'goodnight beautiful'. I think my 'desperate for a guy phase' has just moved into a fuck my life phase.
the bar just sent me a facebook message congratulating me on being a regular and getting such good grades. my life is not real.
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
I can't believe I've come to a point in my life where sex for a birthday present is acceptable
note: just because the casino is called bourbon street, it doesn't mean you can puke and keep walking and no one will care. chalk me up for another 86
well i maturbated this morning, which means the best part of my day has already happened.
If I die write a nice eulogy and bury me with my star wars bobbleheads
Oh god. Charles just fell off the bar. Didn't spill his drink. He's come so far..
College is really paying off. I am gonna be a great teacher. I just made a grading sheet for weed. This shit got an A.
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
I’ve chosen to watch a Mercedes station wagon drive around the Austrian in the rain because it’s live sports. If that doesn’t explain 2020, I don’t know what does.
You fucked him, didn’t you?
He showed up at my house with tacos, rum and a negative Covid test. Of course I fucked him. I’m just a simple girl that likes tacos, not Margaret Thatcher!
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