dipping my christmas cookies in kaluha. santa would be proud.
There are GROWN MEN with fake HP wands flinging curses at me in Walmart.
That's funny. Are they weird looking???
OF COURSE THEY ARE WEIRD LOOKING, THEY ARE STALKING ME IN WALMART. WITH. FAKE. WANDS.
I think he just gave me the 'I used to fuck your sister' discount
After all you put him through, I think it was only right that you saluted the bartender when you left.
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
Maybe tomorrow I'll be drunk again and can provide you with texts at a more reasonable hour. Here's hoping. GOodnight. Tebow loves you
I just don't know the best way to tell him I think I saw him in a porn. I mean I got off to it, isn't there some level of awkwardness there?
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
Beer bong just needs to be rebedazzled but it's gonna make it
I fucked your neighbor. Welcome to the new apartment!
Sooo, did you delete me cause I said I wouldn't babysit you while you did shrooms? You're a grown man.
you made it your goal to puke in every planter around the union. you got most of them. im proud of you
If it were up to me his wife would never get his penis again, but I guess they have some sort of arrangement
Yes, an arrangement called marriage
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