Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
By the way, her vagina was so tight i was worried that i would be stuck forever
Come scavenge bits of tuna out of my chest hair
I know it sounds like a good idea, but doing Spanish homework at a bar just because the owners are Mexican and they give us margaritas really wasn't the best decision.
we found a loaf of bread in my bathroom i believe its yours. sorry i took a shower before we noticed so it might be soggy
Pretty sure I was rubbing Halloween candy all over my face and saying "these are my bitches."
I am never going on a blind date ever again. He drank way too much and kept telling me I had a nice boob. Like.. Singular. What's the other one? The ugly twin?
Good. Need a drinking partner later. FOR AMERICA!!!
I'm 99% sure I just flashed my dad with my vagina. So that's the new low now.
You're always so late and I'm always so drunk.
How am i even supposed to meet his daughter? "Hi, Claire, I hear we have so much in common, like we both love your Dad and also we're almost the same age."
Have you heard yourself have sex?
I'm not THAT loud...
My neighbors filed a noise complaint.
it's like i'm your dad, but instead of reminding you to bring your lunch to school i remind you to take a good long hit from your bong.
Is this making any sense, because I’m puking and trying to be Philosophical right now
Randomize
