for halloween i should be pregnant. what is scarier than that?!
Hey sis... Don't forget moms day is this sun. And don't get her another gift while you are freakin high this time. The vibrator was embarrassing.
FYI the vibrator was a SUCCESS. She was in a much better mood this last year. Maybe you should get high this time and get a great gift
He tried to make eye contact, he should know by now that freaks me out
Just so we're on the same page, we cannot have been the first people to have ever thought about shooting that guy with crossbow
says the girl that drank her shots like they were in a dog bowl
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
Driving by his house every hour is not stalking, it's a reconnaissance mission... How else can I confront him
I mean I feel like if you explain to the emoji app company that your friend got plastered and fell to the ground and is trying to scheme her way back to normal life and get her dignity back they would understand just how necessary it is to have a fingers crossed emoji...
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
You're worse than that girl who made out with her cousin at that party
That was you...
There would be some who claim I got a little "carried away" or that we "probably don't need that many jello shots". They would be wrong.
At IHOP. It feels weird and sad that your cleavage isn't here for me to try to toss paper wads into.
We tried to do sophisticated last night, but our low class kept shining through.
Her tramp stamp said call me maybe. You should have run for the nearest decontamination shower immediately.
P.s. There are few things I love more than brand new mascara and you are one of them.
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