i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
i told the doctor i drank a college amount of alcohol. judgemental prick
At the end of the night you handed the bartender a piece of paper with the word "VISA" written on it.
This girl has a mullet weave. I missed oakland.
I have bruises everywhere. I think I took "the drinks are strong" as more of a challenge than a warning.
What are you wearing tonight?
The colors of the winddddddd
I think I just got judged by the pizza guy. dude, you deliver fucking pizza. you need rethink YOUR life.
I'm sitting in my 10 am lecture drinking a flask out of a dorritos bag...I think people are starting to notice but I'm already too drunk to care
My dad told me to bring weed to easter Sunday dinner..
If so I'm coming over there. There's no way I'm having "hello, how are you" conversations with my neighbors on acid
You left your hot dogs in my dresser again
Almost lost a vagina lip in the great shave of '16
You're incredible, and I'm drunk
Randomize
