I'm at some bar in brklyn... just made out with a guy named Owen.
He is a pre-school teacher... just sang me a song about weather.
Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
He violated my cat. I was not impressed.
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
Make sure you have everything youll need until sunday. aka a green shirt and condoms.
Fuck that. I will get OUT of CONTROL And rise from a hangover on Sunday like Jesus himself.
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
I am so excited I do not know how I will sleep.
It's like the Christmas morning of dicks
did you know the cops in wilco have clean up kits in their cars for when people puke in them? i found this out this morning. i'm finishing paperwork now. come get me plz?
WHY IS THE HAIRSPRAY SOUNDTRACK PLAYING IN THE LIQUOR STORE
WHY DID YOU NOT OFFER TO LET HIM STAY
Dude, it's like you want him inside me more than i do
It's 7am. I'm making pizza & watching the Matrix. I will not be bothered.
To answer your next question, yes, I'm drunk.
You kept running around yelling "I need my pajamas" & then you got naked. Shit just went downhill from there.
I need mimosas to revive my soul
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