well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
You even been so high breaking up weed with your fingers feels like surgery?
He's coming over tonight...I really wish I didn't have my period right now...
I believe I'm witnessing the first time ever that you wished your period would NOT come....
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How do the people at CVS not know your living in their bathroom?
You could probably play six degrees of separation of my cock in this city.
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
Dude. All those hangovers I never had came back with a vengeance. I just opened the door of this car to barf. The car was not motionless. We are on the autobahn.
thanks for not telling him i named my trumpet after his dick
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
By early evening I was shouting at the deeply Christian girl to suck my dick inbetween snorting lines of gatorade powder.
you know it's been too long when the heat of a pizza box on your lap turns you on.
We took a walk on the beach after the bar, he held my hand and kissed me. And then I peed under a lifeguard stand. It was so romantic.
He stuck a cigarette in my butt last night. There is no coming back from that.
Did I ever tell you what happened that night after he ran you over?
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