So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
dude, i was at the student union last night trying to study but some retarded sorority spent an hour voting on the color of the seasons shirts like it was a UN meeting- someone motioned purple, someone objected, and half an hour later after 2 recounts they decided on purple
she gave me a handjob in the middle of the night and my stomach growled so she walked out totally naked and came back 5 minutes later with two sandwiches. who the fuck says getting married is awful?
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
Careful when you walk in I'm laying by the door.
Waking up in a pool chair wrapped in toilet paper is not what I planned when I agreed to movie night
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
She's gone now. Left with the wind like a majestic leaf that just rides the invisible current to locations unknown. And dude, her friends were really hot.
he spent an hour trying to convince us that Ted Nugent is Kid Rock from the future. by the end of it i was very close to believing him.
While I was sneeking out of her apartment, there was a giant cage with a parrot in it. I half expected it to squak "hit and run...hit and run."
i sent my dealer a picture of the money i would pay him. i also told him i would pay him in cheez-its if he would prefer that.
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
I don't know man. She said my cock made her promises my heart couldn't fulfill.
someday i'll meet a man and who loves me as much as i love getting drunk and starting fires
Randomize
