he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
We JUST got rid of the new years fatties at my gym and now the spring break fatties are here. goddamn.
I left puerto rico a week ago and my vagina still smells like coconut.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you got me arrested i just think that goes without question you owe me a blowjob
Im thinking about quitting weed for my dog
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
I don't know what I would do if cheese never existed
Someone's stooooned
she was braiding my hair and singing forever young while she vommed everywhere at the same time. Talent.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not really sure if I peed the bed last night or if the cat was trying to get back at me for using her litter box last weekend
Multi-day drunkenness is to binge drinking as black diamonds are to skiing. They're tough and confusing and you hurt afterwards, but you did it and you probably got an alright story along the way.
Whoever decided to put a Denny's that close to the strip club is a genius.
just so you know they found you begging for money at the L station. What the fuck did you drink last night?
christmas shopping: 3 hours in the liquor store...
I love millennial parents. One of the moms at the daycare center literally told me she and her husband named two of her kids after batman characters and one after game of thrones
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