Was i wearing a white blazer when you superpoke danced me??
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
He fell and asked for a beer and a band-aid.
HE GOT FOURTEEN STICHES
She literally just puked and rallied AT HER OWN WEDDING. Welcome to White Trash town, America.
I just blurted out "it's pretty tight isn't it"
making a list of all the places we've peed. separate list of places we peed when we were stoned
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
Also I just sneezed literally 12 times in a row so violently...boogers everywhere. Sorry to ruin the sexting. I just felt like you had to know
I peed sitting down because I knew standing was a lost cause
That which doesn't kill you gives you an excuse to get shitfaced later
He found a way to charmingly ask me for a threesome and when I said no he made it sound like he was even happier. He's a fucking wizard
At least I had a $10 coupon for Plan B today. Smart shopping for bad decisions
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
Randomize
