Tall, dark & handsome can suck my short, pale & awkward dick.
I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
So we were sitting in his back seat and he asked me if I practiced giving head. I mean really, who asks that?
Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
I wish they had a "No Yankees" filter on status updates.
dinner with the girl I motorboated last semester wasn't as awkward as I thought it would be
How can he have such a manly penis and baby hands?!
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
She keeps telling me I can't keep feeding the dog my food. I gave half the weed brownie to the dog and half to me. I just want it to taste the greatness of cheezits like I am.
we're going to the olympic park to run the 100m yeaaaahhh
it's 3am. Nothing could possibly go wrong here.
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
is it too soon to tell him I'm available anytime for Christmas themed pity sex and I'll even wear a Santa hat?
I got here. Mom yelled "drink of the day is blueberry sangria" and next thing I knew I was on a slip and slide.
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