Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
This guy has a retainer. We're golden.
he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
For future reference, Twizzlers CAN leave welts.
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
If you happen to tell anybody my drunk story in the near future, please refrain from telling them about me shitting myself. People are getting the wrong idea and random people are messaging me on Facebook making fun of me for that
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final.
..needless to say, i got fired. But I'm in the parking lot tanning on top of your car... so its not all bad.
On a scale of 1-10 I’m at biblical violence
color coded lube a great way to organize my bootie calls
Third time this week I've caught co workers dry humping. Quarantine really changes people's priorities.
I'm listening to a women in metal station and wearing a flannel. I may have approached peak lesbian.
Randomize
