what made you think it was a good idea to trust the girl that hides tequila in her backpack?
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
You yelled "sharpie war!" then jammed it in her ear
Just saw the guy with the plastic bag on his head riding his bike again...
I wanna give a stern lecture to whoever invented pants cause they are hard right now
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
Oh my god I peed in a park last night and then tried to set off fireworks with a group of middle-aged men
The Deck is crawling with Cougars. Sound the irresponsibility alarm and come drink with me on a Tuesday night.
I would rather get explosive diarrhea at the aquarium than go home alone tonight
How can other people our age be acting like adults when I'm still taking my birth control pill with left over gin and tonic from the night before?
Seeing your boyfriend, side piece, and great white buffalo, all in one night? Its a sign right?
Proceed with caution.
currently working on a look that screams, "I'm dead inside, but still trying to enjoy the ride"
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
And you tried to get me to have sex with you in our Harry potter closet lol
Randomize
