Currently looking for a new liver on ebay. Struggle.
They need to add a relationship status option on fb that says "having the baby of..."
i kept drunkenly begging people i met to be in my facebook mafia
When she showed me how she could touch her toes without bending her knees, suddenly her face didn't worry me quite as much.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just witnessed a bar fight started by a guy wearing a construction vest cuz he didn't like the other guys shirt
When you text me tomorrow to remind me to mail your parking pass, also remind me to make sure i did NOT pack my vibrator for this family vacation
Whatever you didn't send me pics of you topless making bacon
Some guy just hit on me and then said, well you look too young to ride the emotional roller coaster and guestured to his dick.
We were having sex in the gardens when the grounds keeper walked up on us. He gave me a thumbs up and walked away
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At first I was nervous about leaving him my undergraduate legacy, but apparently he made out with lesbians, woke up with hickeys and a different shirt. My family name will survive.
That was the second worst thing to happen to my asshole.
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
Being pregnant feels like you have a hangover everyday.. Don't listen to what anyone says about how wonderful it is
Puke-y regrets or just things-seem-far-away regrets?
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
Randomize