Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
you kept saying 'can i put my penis on the grill?' and it was all i could do to stop you. you're welcome, though
just saw a midget ride a motorized cooler into the liquor store. i'm gonna follow him home.
We've only been driving for two hours and I'm already down 3 vicodin...I'm not going to survive this family vacation.
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You kept tellin the cashier that this order was "To Go" over and over...even tho we were in the drive-thru
I'm too tired to go all the way tonight, especially if you're going to quote Katy Perry at me during
I'm at your house, laying with your dog, eating taco meat, take your time.
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
If you invite me to a bar tonight my liver will kick you in the testicles
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Aaaand I cut your bangs with a large knife last night ...
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
As Scar once said. Be prepared! For the shit show of what's coming tonight
My gynecologist just said "don't worry, this won't be as hard as…well…" A FUCKING SEX JOKE NO
Also, if you don't fuck me soon, I will die. I don't want to die like that.
I'm on a party bus with a stripper pole with middle aged women who have all started drinking
God bless your soul.
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