What did we do last night that was yellow?
Deffinety need to stop having sex on the beach just took a dump and it was mostly sand
what do 4 police cars, 1 ambulence, and 2 fire truycks have in common?.... My driveway
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's called "lets see how many European capitals we can do the walk of shame through in one year"
Why is it that every study session with you turns into a hunt for drugs?
He's under the table sobbing because he doesn't live in a taco if you ever get him this high again I will stab you
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
Lol. I get my husbands paycheck every week. Immediate deposit into my purse next to his balls.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Idk what the interview would be like but I imagine you in a suit and tie surveying a nervous freshman and eventually leading him into a labyrinth of debauchery and clapping him on the back, saying "welcome to the fraternity, son"
My legs feel like baby dolphins
I just found one of your beard hairs in my oatmeal.
honestly the most stressful part of moving is the chance my mom will find my vibrator
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
when i woke up with rugburns on the tops of my feet, knees, and chin i was a little confused. and then i remembered i had sex with him in his friends walk in closet.
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