Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
I sat down with you and helped you write your will last night. I was THAT convinced that you weren't waking up.
And there I was, sitting Indian style on the kitchen floor, my fingers covered in peanut butter.
You'd be surprised at how many crooked penises are out there
and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
you're just mad cause i madeout with you while having a mouth full of chewed pretzels
I want to be done crawling through windows but the sex is too good to stop...but I'm running out of excuses for where the bruises on my legs are coming from.
I apparently insisted on hugging all the bushes and apologizing for pollution on the way home.
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
I dropped a piece of Mac and cheese in the shower and I almost still ate it. Stoned, but not stoned enough to degrade myself.
im gonna miss him. and by him, i mean his dick
I have to charm this cab driver. Hold on.
The smell of pee and coconut conditioner still makes me think of him
Randomize
