I don't know where your sunglasses are, I was too preoccupied with girls not old enough to drive past midnight.
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
No. Do you know how much this carpet cost? If she comes over, you put down towels this time. i'm so not kidding.
he made his penis look like a sprinkler when he was coming. it was pretty cool actually.
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
I think I just smoked a piece of your foot. Were u picking your feet by the weed?
I just stood still on a stair at the train station expecting it to go down automatically like an escalator... Today's going to be a good day
All I remember is sitting on your kitchen floor and playing with a banana like it was a viking ship.
I was figuring I'd break up with her after work, but before Taco Tuesday
Id like to submit an apology whenever you feel like talking.
Its not gonna be for awhile Im not a very forgiving person especially since you TOTALED MY FUCKING CAR.
Omg I just woke up in his bed.. I'm fully clothed and he is naked. I'm so confused.
Also, I had mind-blowing sex on a pool table
Between his smile and monumental dick even the virgin mary woulda blown that man and I am far from the virgin. I didn't stand a chance.
That's nice of you to be concerned, but I'm pretty confident I'll marry someone 30 years older than me, ride out being the trophy wife for 10 or 15 years, then live large!
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