I am slurping my drink like I am going to the electric chair
Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
You know you have a problem when the only thing that saves you is that you drank so late into the night that you sleep through the designated walk of shame time window
so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
Watching marley and me... this girls got me whipped man
i want the original willy wonka imagination song to come on when i take a girl to my room
This is me reassuring you that I'm still alive and making sure you still are.
i dont even mind you always shaving my pubes when i pass out, i'm starting to find it liberating.
i can't believe you just compared my dick to leprosy
I think I'm leaving the streamers and balloons up from 4th of july till after he stops by. It'll be like the universe is celebrating his massive dick.
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
The one that slept in my truck and you peed in his face?
We got cut off at a bar at 4pm. We aren't human
He literally asked permission to hit on me
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