Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
so while trying to be a healthier drunk i discovered that putting airborne in natty is not an advisable decision
Facebook is used to stalk your friends, Twitter is used to stalk celebritie=s, and Myspace is used to stalk underaged girls. Everything else is porn. T=he Internet in a nutshell.
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
I don't remember what happened but judging from the contents of my pockets it had something to do with potatoes and glo in the dark condoms
Just pissed in my own closet. Had no idea adult dinner parties could he so awesome.
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
I'm sports announcer narrating myself making a sandwich. Your weed wins.
I'm doing blow on my fuzzy rug
Come join me
Getting haircut. The stylist asked about the body paint dried in my hair. I told her there was prob glitter, too. It was a fun night!
I was so gone I thought the cops banging on my door were kids from the party trying to get into my room... needless to say, I started moaning louder so they would take the hint.
Everything is bullshit and I hate everyone
Howd it go?
Well we had the "no we're not fucking on the porch" conversation but then we totally fucked on the porch. So I'd say alright.
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
If you think me talking about that hot guy accepting my LinkedIn request is pornographic, I’m not sure how you’re gonna feel when I tell you I fucked a stranger on a park bench last weekend
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