If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
My therapist told me it was ok for me to "take risks" now. Cue the hookers and blow.
I just saw a group of 50+ year old women all wearing shirts that said "drink up, bitches" ...please tell me that can be us some day.
I was passed out in a dog food bowl tor two hours. Just tapped my dinner beer. I love homecoming.
I think ur a lot drunker then u think u are. That girl has the body of a cartoon character and not in a good way.
her spring break bucket list included "break into The Swamp, blow him where Tebow has Tebowed"
That final makes me want to drink myself into the fetal position
Girl behind me in line at cvs was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan b soon she might be a mom abd that if we couldn't tell she'd be a terrible mom
Girl please we both know I eat his bullshit up like its candy sprinkled with crack
So he says to my dad "I'll pull out of your daughter but I'm not going to apologize". Yea, my night was fun.
I have the most nasty and explicit wet dreams of my boss that I'm embarrassed to look him in the face. I'd be pregnant or promoted if he only knew
No other way to put this but the dick was not worth him crying for an hour after. No more online hookups.
feeding cats lunchmeat on my kitchen floor. come pour me another shot.
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