So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
Just getting around to doing laundry. Jesus there's a lot of blood on my birthday dress.
I wouldn't really call it 'getting lucky' considering I paid her to do it.
the chick you hooked up with on my couch facebook friended me.
just thought you should know her name is kristen
I fucked her while she was wearing her boyfriends dogtags. I'm officially a bad american
check off brunette on the list of girls tht hit me with there cars and then fucked me later
It took years to rebuild my brains forcefield against your charm and I feel like u seal team 6'd ur way in again and caught my common sense sleeping on post
Im pretty sure that girl just said "Im taking you home even if your girlfriend has to come too." Why are we here again?
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
This time tomorrow I'll be fingering you
Oh shit a waiter was leaning over me when i opened that and i felt him pause
What if he stabs me in the back, mid-orgasm, as I sit on his face? It'd be a miraculous way to go but that's not the point
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
Nothing ruins an orgasm faster than accidentally calling out his boss's name
Crazy homeless man drinking beer out of a vitamin water container on the bus just set me up on a date with the yuppie next to him
we're tipping the strippers with chocolate coins.
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