ive had 594 apples! thats 99 apples 6 times! math!
yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
are you going to last longer than 15 seconds
nope
I'm just gonna go nail your roommate after we break up anyway.
Look dude I'm sorry I used your bong to snorkel in my bathtub last night
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
I've never used poorer judgment in my life. It's mathematically possible that I impregnated 5 women in the past 24 hours since I won the lottery. But I couldn't be happier about it.
I swear to god little potato creatures live inside Belvedere bottles and claw at your throat as you swallow shots.
We don't watch enough power rangers
Yes, yes I will fake crap in his house for you.
As soon as I got there, you appeared out of no where, yelled "they're giving away free cigarettes!" in my face and then disappeared and I didn't see you the rest of the night.
You were carrying a 6 ft lamp that we stole on your back yelling "OHANA MEANS FAMILY AND FAMILY MEANS NOBODY GETS LEFT BEHIND"
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
I DONT HAVE THE SOCIAL SKILLS TO EXPLAIN THAT YOU DIED EATING MY PUSSY
The end of the friendship was inevitable. I hooked up with her cousin and forgot to mention it to her
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