goodnight i made you a song goodbye
fuck the hobbit
what about unicorns?
fuck those pointy horses
smell my finger.
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
he kept yelling THIS ISNT AMATEUR HOUR
Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.
why is my underwear the only thing i was wearing that smells like vodka?
3 2 1 whiskey
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
I can't believe I got dumped for a fat chick, but at least I got four and a half years worth of free shit. So we can call it even.
i can eat my weight in tater tots. don't test me, bitch
Decisions were made. The quality of them will be judged tomorrow
You ever stub your boner? It happened to me. Just know that drugs and strip poker and a hot tub. I'll Regale you with the story over drinks later.
He wouldn’t know a good thing if it bit him on the ass. Which, btw, I did.
The heart wants what the heart wants, and once again it’s a guy with brown hair, wears a chain, and has a nicotine addiction.
Randomize
