You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
party started at 10. cops are coming to shut us down now and its 11. i already lostmy underwear and im wearing a sparkly thong on my haed. this has to be some kinda record.
Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
how the hell did this chicken wing end up in my cast?!
to instagram or to not instagram the picture i took of when i shit in the urinal
I don't have any bail money, if that's where this conversation is going
You is good. You is important. You is a slut.
In the middle of having sex she stopped, said "guess what, it's clitoris awareness week" and then continued fucking me
He fell backwards into a full bathtub but didn't spill a single drop of the beer in his hand. What a pro.
He came over apologized for his lack of sexual skills. Cleaned my kitchen cooked me dinner. And gave me another one minute stand. I think im okay with this
She was dressed as a banana and told me that I needed more potassium in my diet. Of course I went down on her.
orgy was averted by karaoke, thank god
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
Randomize
