you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified.
I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes.
she said 'i love fried rice', threw a condom at me and passed out naked.
I get way too drunk to be trusted with family heirlooms
he's washing the lighter in the sink and telling me to picture unicorns. requesting backup.
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
I totally just found ecstasy floating around in the bottom of my purse, it's almost like good karma from the time I lost that blow...but not quite
Dude he fell into my wall and left an imprint then decided to have sex with the door open. Vents carry noise pretty well
It was so weird. She left to go to the bathroom and her older sister leaned towards me with a creepy smile and said, "You don't deserve her" and then continued to stare at me with a crazy expression for the rest of the evening.
That's kinky shit dude.
I've already made the "blackout on move in day" decision
Matt you can be anything you want to be. Including the awesome guy that brings pizza to a bunch of stoned and sorta drunk kids.
Still stoned. I like your bong. It can stay. No others, though.
Kid got so high from the brownies he forgot his own name. Welcome to college.
Every time we have sex, I feel his dick ramming my soul into submission. Problem is..... I LIKE THAT SHIT!
I'm sorry i showed you my boobs.. I probably shouldn't have done that.
Randomize
