Goddamnit I hate your level headedness
The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
haha my mom just sent us out to go to all of the hair cutting places to ask for hair because deer ate all our zuchini.. and we have to pee in a bucket all day cause deer hate urine. please tell me we are normal?
i cant lie to you.
Just found out what was wrong with Esther. Turns out she's 33 and still not married. This explains everything.
I vomitted in the hotel where they film gossip girl last night. Everywhere.
I feel like college is just one giant drunken trip to Taco Bell
Also. This Ativan makes me feel fearless. I think we need an exciting new hobby for when we take it. How do you feel about ghost hunting?
I took so my adderall all I can do is lie on my floor and stare too hard at my hedgehog. He has 42 spines in the dark spot on his shoulder btw.
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
Some old bald man is a 100,000 dollar Audi sports car just revved his engine at me and held out his phone at me trying to get my number. I hate the valley.
I THINK it was the lead singer. Whoever he was, I have his number and his dick was pierced.
It was totally the lead singer.
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
Not sure if your roommate speaks German while sleeping, or if she woke up, figured out we were fucking, and used German to swear at us.
I'm soaking her vibrators in tabasco and wasabi paste. "furious" is an understatement
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