I cockslap morals
I have a new reason to go to work: I can tell which 3 of my coworkers are sisters just by looking at their butts.
last time i saw her she was begging the broken jukebox to play lady gaga.
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
i feel this outfit says i'm better than you, but i might give you a handjob behind a building
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
You'd be surprised how many calories hedonism burns.
I've been sleeping with the same person for about two months now, I think I know a little bit about stability and commitment.
People are talking politics and I have had 9 mimosas
I know it's my dream I got hurt enough to leave work but not hurt enough to stop drinking
I swear I was in Legend of Zelda Twilight Princess and American Ninja Warrior at the same time. I'm never getting high while rock climbing again.
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
Thought the acid was fake. Then my reflection didn't move when I did in the bathroom.
btw...it's noon and i'm sitting here drinking wine and eating pixie stix. I really need to find something to do...
Randomize
