just drove past a church sign that said "jesus got 'er done" ... welcome to the south
he's sitting on top of the fridge in only a black speedo and wont get down
What's the point of being healthy if people still don't want to fuck you?
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
don't worry i won't let him get attached. I put on my Hulk onesie after sex and yelled I SMASHED YOU. never seen a guy looked so confused.
I COULD BREAK CONCRETE WITH MY FOOTBALL ERECTION.
LESSON OF THE DAY: Saying Everclear gets you out of explaining anything.
One last thing: he lists glow sticks and tacos as things he can't live without. How would we not be friends??
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
Successfully defrauded the county government. What have you done today?
After last night I am convinced that you are the human embodiment of alcoholism and bad decisions.
Sitting in the dr office she literally looked at my throat and goes have you been having oral intercourse
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