Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
i really wish james franco would like my vagina
"Tuesday" and "open-bar" shouldn't be used in the same sentence.
I feel like I'm a marionette being lifted around. Four Loko.
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
got woken up at 7:30 by a drunk girl asking me where she was... apparently she slept on my futon
she was in a cheetah costume
Tonight's trip to the ER was brought to you by, "fork jousting."
All i remember was you crying naked on the bathroom floor because you were cold. I got you a blanket and you kept kicking it off and crying because you were still cold.
If the Cards come back I will fly to St Louis and shit in a very public place.
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
He sent me a mirror pic of himself and sent it to me and all i could think about was the amazing bong hits i took with his roommate in that bathroom.
If my birthday doesn't end with my panties hanging from a ceiling fan, I'm holding you responsible.
The only person who DOESN'T think it's a horrible idea to sleep with my ex is my therapist. Obviously I trust her judgement above all others.
How do you know i dont look like i got attacked by a weedwacker on bath salts?
One lesson I've learned so far from college: You've always got time for one more shot. Always
Randomize
