they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
i asked him to tell me something nice and he said "your vagina is really tight."
Just witnessed a fat girl fall off the treadmill, pop a medicine ball, and drink coke out of a water bottle all in one workout.
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
Wait, how is it that I'm just getting ready to go out and you're already showing your penis to freshmen girls?
Some guy stole lobsters by hiding them in his pants. We should strive to be like him.
I'm not sure how appropriate a drug deal is while at a wake.
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
Mike found the condom wrapper on the washing machine and looked at me and said "Magnum? NICE girl. Get that nut!" then proceeded to puke in a cup
I got dressed on his front steps, peed on his neighbors lawn, then did a shoeless walk of shame home at 5am...
You yelled "Everybody!!! Round of applause to Jill for not doing anal!!" Right in front of him.
Is Oprah even human
I'm not sure. I have to find the Greeks I was with last night and see if they can explain to me why I can't hear out of my right ear and why I look like I got the shit kicked out of me
he was wearing a pyjama shirt under a dress shirt under a hoodie under a robe under a rain poncho the man was prepared for anything
Is it sad that my idea of a quality foursome would involve one person eating me out while the other two rub my feet?
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