Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
Well he asked to have a sober hang out so i guess that constitutes as a date in college
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
We just licked a sour creme and onion chip for salt for a tequila shot. Our vacation has officially begun.
i jus dunped the rest of my drink down the sink and tool my bra off. pretty sure this is the best decision for everybody.
I'm making tacos. Give me one good reason why we shouldn't be high while eating those tacos.
I stole a fireplace last night.
What's grosser: using a dirty sex towel as an oven mitt? or using the oven to reheat superbowl bean dip for dinner?
We wore fake mustaches and shirts that said team mustache ride to a party we weren't even invited to
Just threw up in the MSO airport men's room. We're at that point this morning.
i seriously haven't spoken to him since i drunk dialed him and told him i loved his beard
The bong is packed and it's taco Tuesday come over
She's too awesome to dump: she gives me great blow jobs and free Popeyes. You just don't burn a bridge like that.
He goes from zero to fucking up in 2.4 drinks. Like the sportscar of bad decision making.
Randomize
