Her life has all the ingredients for a how to book: Making Your Life an Epic Fail
At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
I just fucked a rockette. This would have been amazing a week ago.
i need to buy one of the child leashes to wear at mardi gras or else im never making it out alive
We just did a shot to "getting laid in the bar bathroom". I love where this thursday is headed
I have glow sticks stuck to my boobs and a missed call from the 911. I'd say last night was a success.
I vagually remember taking your birthcontrol and washing it down with ash water
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
I just used crown royal bags as pot holders...
CSI Miami is on and the guy is trying to save this woman who got shot. By stripping off his shirt & belt. THE WOMAN NEEDS YOUR PANTS OFF TOO
The homeless guy who goes through my garbage cans just gave me a flyer for an AA group.
I just found out how I got home last night. The bartenders found me sitting in the brush peeing and called me a cab. Have you seen my underwear?
Which one have i been cheating ON and which one have i been cheating WITH if i met them the same night & have been dividing time equally?
Sexual Dilemma - Covid Edition: Flirting with a cute frat boy. The Cougar in me wants to go back to his frat house and fuck his cocky brains out. The adult in me doesn’t want to get Covid and have to quarantine in a frat house for 2 weeks\n
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