No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
Zach says you can't see his penis until after we're married...not sure why?! Bt then he said he thinks maybe you already have on the wild animal night!
Is it wrong of me that I wish I could be a midget for a day so I can give head standing up?
They got a 10 foot tall beach ball from the roof of a McDonalds. Get the fuck over here.
Man, I want to make his penis a sandwich.
Do you have any puffy paint? I want to put "fiesta muthafuckas" on my sombrero but its too much to bedazzle.
Evvvvvveryone knows we hooked up in the DJ booth. People call it the BJ booth now. I've created a legacy
I'm gonna try Jim's breakup remedy this weekend.
Is that the one where you drink 3 cases of beer and rewatch as much WWE RAW as you can find? Or the one where you hookup with fatties on Craigslist?
Can we go to the gas station to get cigarettes before we get drunk. It's hard enough to say Marlboro sober.
how much boxed wine can one drink before work in a couple of hours?
WHERE THE FUCK'S MY FUCKING RITALIN YOU FUCKING FASCIST?????
We were fucking in the boat on the lake when another boat saw us and honked their appreciation.
Someone just needs to roll me into a blanket burrito and feed me drugs
There’s nothing that says motivation more than watching these little geniuses on Kids Baking Championship New Year’s Day. I’m ready to fuck shit up this year.
I got a message the other day that just said “great tits”
A gentleman AND a scholar
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