are you still at the devil's house?
their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
Tittie bar + Mother In law gone = mission accomplished.
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
I won't be sarcastic... just naked
once you have herpes you dont really care what goes in your mouth anymore.
they call him Oral-B. enough said
The sex I just had was not worth missing a girls night out.
come to Starbucks. I'm the fat girl eating a whole pizza sitting on the ground
I was in the bathroom puking up mountains of tequila and when he came to help me, I held the door shut and kept yelling at him to let me be a lady.
Beer pong consisted of me throwing a ball at the wall and then falling over because moving my arm made me dizzy. I think our team lost.
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
I woke up in a chipotle parking lot with an industrial sized box of condoms and a bag of dounut holes. I need Jesus
Btw when I was saying "fuck you" I meant it like "be quiet beautiful princess"
Dude I just clenched/unclenched my hindquarters while looking in the mirror I have fucking talent
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