i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
the scent of your tears make me crave pizza
What kind of gift says: "I love you because you're my mom & I'm obligated to, but I don't like you" ?
I almost bumped into a man wrapped only in a blanket at 10 am
I brought a guy home then decided no. Took him back to the bar and said "I'm going to drop you where I found you. Have fun"
I wish him all the best and hope one day he can afford the surgery to remove his head from his ass
Today was my cousin's Kindergarten graduation. I happen to also think of it as a MILF convention.
He put chocks of wood in front of his doors to stop me from leaving. I'm not nearly drunk enough for that to be appropriate behaviour.
Meet at Walmart straight from work to buy items for hurricane fun. Then blast some wine, make some sex, blast a bowl and cuddle each other till the sun comes up?
That's the most romantic New Orleans hurrication I've ever heard of. Can I have your babies?
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
I'm spending my Sunday wishing the entire Patriots offense would let me touch their manhood
You are free to stop by. I promise to keep my penis in my leather pants
also, my mom just called to make sure the dick tattoo on your arm was fake..
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
Randomize
