oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
i watch way too much csi for them to even pretend to be my friend.
honey bunches of taint.
I was giving him a handjob and he commented that he loved my nailpolish....I'm destined to die a fag hag
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
This is one of those times where I really wish my vagina could tell me what happened last night.
Im pretty sure he just said he wants to make a baby with me, but he's pretty shitfaced, so I'm not sure if he knows who I am.
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
Like that time I held Annie up and she peed all over the window.. We make a good team.
hey dude come in here and see how much of my beard i can put in my mouth!
I fucking love my neighbors. I offered him chocolate and somehow it turned into a sexual proposition.
I feel like getting drunk at the airport is sort of a rite of passage into adulthood, but maybe i should reserve that occasion for a flight thats not just 1 hr
Is this like a preordered booty call?
She's dancing around licking a fork of nutella. She is not sober.
Randomize
